oh my god.

last day of the holidays and i am

rejoicing and crying at the

same time. rejoicing for the

fact that no school with no

friends, excessive studying

and too many late nights make me

woozy, school will be a relief for me.

crying for the fact that

i haven't finished chinese EOY practice paper.

yes, it does matter to me. and

of course, maths and geography half

done. you could say that

i belong outside on sundays,

not cooped up doing homework especially

not after something as depressing as

catechism class. where i am and

always will be- invisible.

i wouldn't mind it being that way. somewhere

where i could actually have zero social life.

quite amazing but yes.

dragged myself home- dad's not

around so it's one less person

to talk to. D: tried very hard to do chinese

but didn't make it in the end, seriously

i suck too much to even pass the MCQ/short

answer section. yelch. talked to sabbie

for awhile, and then i think

i got so addicted to the computer which

is a suckky feeling because unlike

all those facebookfans or

serious gamers, the main things

i do with a computer is mail, MSN(my

MSNing domain pretty much

is suckish), occasional wikipedia and limewiring,

and then comes blogging. oh dear.

what kind of loser am i?

i prefer outdoorsy stuff, or reading,

or doing homework that i can

complete. soyou could say that i don't

have much of a life. and i hate

practising piano when there are people

around. believe me my mother and sister

are hard to shake. ughhh?!?!?!

i need a new direction. a new life!

this sucks man, it's totally boring.

boredboredboredboredbored.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i need something new.

is this how i'm spending my first

teen year, lost, impressionable with

a heck of a lot of troubles

of my own? is this the sign of what's to come?

or is this just pre-term jitters, post-holiday depression?